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De-Morgan’s Law,

Binomial Avenue,

United States of Matrices.

My Dear Love,

Yesterday, I was passing by your rectangular house in trigonometric lane. There I saw you with your cute circular face, conical nose and spherical eyes, standing in your triangular garden. Before seeing you my heart was a null set, but when a vector of magnitude (likeness) from your eyes at a deviation of theta radians made a tangent to my heart, it differentiated.

My love for you is a quadratic equation with real roots, which only you can solve by making good binary relation with me. The cosine of my love for you extends to infinity. I promise that I should not resolve you into partial functions but if I do so, you can integrate me by applying the limits from zero to infinity.

You are as essential to me as an element to a set. The geometry of my life revolves around you

Recently when I was searching for classified sites…. I discovered this awesome site Stumblehere.com. And the cherry to the ake is that they provide this service for FREE. Free classified ads are always prefered for small or home based buisness where you do not want to spend more of money on large banners and so on.  The major thing that I liked about it is that it is not just yet another dump of classified ads, but is itellegently managed and presented. It offers the visitors the feature of switching in to their local community where the ads are geo targetted. Like wise if I want a service provider from alaska, I do not have to search the particular service section and see if theres anyone from. I can switch to my local community thereby getting the services targetted to my state. You can also have your ads as partner classified ads and there is a link for recent partner ads as well where the users can get the update of the produts.  The for sale section makes it easier for the customers or finders to tack the services or products which are for sale. This helps the sellers as well to survey the current market status and pricing their products accordingly. Besides all these advantages the ace advantage that I think is… that its FREE…

Customer: “How fast will my COM ports go?”
Tech Support: “How hard can you throw your computer?” ___________________________________________________
Customer: “Hello, I have a problem. My name is John Smith.”
Tech Support: “I’m sorry, but I can’t help you with that problem.”
___________________________________________________
Customer: “When I touch the sound card board at the back of my PC, I can feel electric current.”
Tech Support: “Then don’t touch it.”
___________________________________________________
Customer: “What’s the fastest way to move 500 megabytes of data daily from Santa Cruz to Los Angeles?”
Tech Support: “Fed Ex.”
___________________________________________________
Customer: “I can’t get loaded!”
Tech Support: “Try stronger drinks.”
___________________________________________________
Customer: “Can I ask you a really stupid question?”
Tech Support: “Yes. And history will bear me out on that.”
___________________________________________________
Student: “How do I make a paper longer?”
Consultant: “You write more.”

Equation 1

In other words,
Human that don’t know enjoy = Donkey that work
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Equation 2

In other words,
Men that don’t earn money = Donkeys
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In other words,
Women that don’t spend = Donkeys
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To Conclude:

Therefore…from Postulates 1 and 2, we can conclude  Man + Woman = 2 Donkeys that live happily together! 

These are some profile bio’s from a popular Matrimonial site… Grammar and spell errors have
no place in a profile description as everything is straight from the heart!

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Hello To Viewers My Name is Shekhar , I am single i don’t have female,
If anyone want to Marie to me u can visit to my home. I am not a good
education but i working all field in bangalroe.. if u like me u welcome
to my heart…when ever u want to meet pls visit my resident or send u
letter.. Thanks yours Regards Shekhar ~*~
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i want very simple girl. from brahmin educated family from orissa state
she is also know about RAMAYAN, GEETA BHAGABATA, and other homework

(Homework?)

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Wants a woman who knows me better and can adjust with me forever. she
may never create any difficulties in my life or her life by which the
entire life can run smoothly. thank you

(The principle of running life smoothly was never so easy!)
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she should be good looking and should have a service. she Should have
one brother and one sister. she should be educated.

(ain’t it unique !! 1 brother 1 sister criteria !)
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I am a happy-go-lucky kind of person. Enjoys every moments of life. I
love to make friendship. Because friendship is a first step of love. I
am looking for my dreamgirl who will love me more than i. Because i love
myself a lot. If u think that is u then why to late come on ……..hold
my hand forever !!!

(The dilwale dulhaniya effect)

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i am simple boy.I have lot of problem in my life because of my luck now
i am looking one gal she care me and love me lot lot lot

(I don’t know why but this is one of my favorites)
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My wife should be as ‘Shivani’ as in Kahani Ghar Ghar Ki and as Tanwerr
as in KSBKBT……

(Ok I haven’t seen these soaps but I am sure he must be demanding too
much,ain’t he?)

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i want a girl with no drinks if she wants she can wear jeans in house
but while stepping out of house she should give respect to our cast

(by not wearing her jeans? Wat the hell…)

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HYE I AM A GOOD LOKING BOY,WHO HAS THE CAPABILITY TO MAKE ANY BODY TO
LOUGH.I BELIEVE IN GOD AND ACCORDING TO ME FRIENDS ARE THE REAL
MESSENGER OF GOD. THE 3 THINGS I AM LOOKING FROM A GIRL ,THEY ARE 1.THEY
MUST BELIEVE IN GOD.2. THEY HAVE TO LIKE MY PROFFESION AND THEY SHOULD
NOT GET BORED WITH ME WHEN I WILL TRY TO MAKE THEM LOUGH.

(all of us are loughing{laughing})

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whatever she may be but she should feel that she is going to be someone
bride and she must think of the future life if she is too like this she
would be called the woman of the lamp

(I am clueless, I feel so lost. Can anyone tell me what this boy wants)
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i love my patner i marriage the patner ok i search my patner and i love
thepatner ok thik hai the patner has a graduate ok

(I am again clueless but I liked the use of “ok”. The person is
suffering from “Ok-syndrome”)

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HI IAM VERY COOL NUATHER OK MY HOBBY IS SEE T.V AND NEWS OK I HAVE 1 CAR
AND 1 BONWL OK MY MOTHER ALSO GOOD OK MY FARUET WORLD IS OK

(the “ok syndrome” again)

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I am pran my family history my two brother two sister and Father&mother
sister complity marred

(somebody please explain in comments section how to get married
‘completely’?)
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iam very simpel and hanest. i have three sister one brother and parent.
i
am doing postal sarvice and tailor master my original resdence at
kalahandi diste naw iam staing at rayagada dist.

(actually what is this guy doing? Postal service or tailor.??)

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my name is muhamad and i am unmarried. pleaes you marrige me pleaes
pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes

(height of desperation! J )
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Iwant one girl who love me or my mother. she love me heartly or she
havea frank she’s skin colour ‘normal’not a black or not a whitey.
IThink the main think is heart if your heart is beautiful then you are
beautiful.
but
iam not a handsome guy or not a good looking. but my Mom say that Iam a
good guy. My father already expired . THE CHOICE IS YOUR.
bye bye.

(uttama purushan)
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iam kanan. i do owo businas.one sistar.he was marred.

(No comments)
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I AM LITTLE FAIR INDIAN COLOUR. I DON’T HAVE ANY HABIT.

(maybe the poor guy meant BAD habits)

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hello i am a good charactarised man. i want to run my life happily.i
divorced my first wife.her charactor is not good’. i expect the good
minded and clean habits girl who may be in the same caste or other caste
accepted …

(but credit cards not accepted..???)

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my colour is black,but my heart is white.i like social service

(Zebra..???)

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i’m looking out for who lives in bombay , girl simple who trust me lot
should be roman catholic, LOVE ME ONLY.

(Now that criterion is a must, isn’t it?)

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to be married on jan-2009. working woman perferable

(this guy has fixed the marriage date too! But he is yet to find a
bride.
I wish him best of luck on behalf of all of us. I am sure he will get
one
soon.)

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i would like a beautyfull girl. and i do not want her any treasure.
because girl is the maharani.

(Now she is going to be a lucky girl! Any takers?)

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ssc failed three times and worked with privated ltd company which not
paying salary at present.

(Any takers again?)